Unity Hospice®

Recommended Reading

Coping with Grief? Maybe these will be of assistance...

One of the most important psychological studies of the late twentieth century, On Death and Dying grew out of Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's famous interdisciplinary seminar on death, life, and transition. In this remarkable book, Dr. Kübler-Ross first explored the now-famous five stages of death: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Through sample interviews and conversations, she gives the reader a better understanding of how imminent death affects the patient, the professionals who serve that patient, and the patient's family, bringing hope to all who are involved.

Shortly before her death in 2004, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler, her collaborator, completed the manuscript for this, her final book. On Grief and Grieving is a fitting completion to her work. Thirty-six years and sixteen books ago, Kübler-Ross's groundbreaking On Death and Dying changed the way we talk about the end of life. Now On Grief and Grieving will profoundly influence the way we experience the process of grief.

On Death and Dying began as a theoretical book, an interdisciplinary study of our fear of death and our inevitable acceptance of it. It introduced the world to the now-famous five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. On Grief and Grieving applies these stages to the process of grieving and weaves together theory, inspiration, and practical advice, all based on Kübler-Ross's and Kessler's professional and personal experiences, and is filled with brief, topic-driven stories. It includes sections on sadness, hauntings, dreams, coping, children, healing, isolation, and even the subject of sex during grief.

"I know death is close," Kübler-Ross says at the end of the book, "but not quite yet. I lie here like so many people over the years, in a bed surrounded by flowers and looking out a big window....I now know that the purpose of my life is more than these stages....It is not just about the life lost but also the life lived."

In one of their final writing sessions, Kübler-Ross told Kessler, "The last nine years have taught me patience, and the weaker and more bed-bound I become, the more I'm learning about receiving love."

On Grief and Grieving is Elisabeth Kübler-Ross's final legacy, one that brings her life's work profoundly full circle.

Preschool to Early School Age

Where's Jess?, by J. Johnson
(Centering Corp., 1982)
Preschool to early school age.
In this picture book, a mother and father answer in simple and comforting ways a young child's questions about death and the death of their new baby.

About Dying: An Open Book for Parents and Children Together, by Sara Stein
(New York, Walker, 1974)
Preschool to early school age.
This book teaches about death, funerals, burial, and remembering by telling the story of two siblings who experience the death of a pet bird, and who later experience the death of their grandfather. It also features text for parents to help them deal with questions and issues children may have.

The Empty Place: A Child's Guide through Grief, by Roberta Temes
(Far Hills, N.J., Small Horizons, 1992)
Preschool to early school age.
In this book, a young boy talks about how empty he feels since his sister died and talks with a baby sitter who had a similar experience. It touches on guilt, lack of interest in old activities, and changes in parental behavior.

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Preschool to School Age

The Fall of Freddie the Leaf, by Leo Buscaglia
(New Jersey, Charles Slack, 1982)
Preschool to school age.
This book shows the seasons of life using the story of Freddie the Leaf, who falls from the tree in autumn. It explains that leaves do not come back to life and that death is not the same as sleep.

Thumpy's Story: A Story of Love and Grief Shared by Thumpy, the Bunny, by N. Dodge
(Prairie lark Press, 1984)
Preschool to school age.
This book tells a simple story with soft, expressive illustrations of two rabbit parents who help their surviving child by dealing sensitively with fears and questions. It is designed to help children and parents express their own grief, and is available as a coloring book and a work book in which the child can write and draw.

Lifetimes: A Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children, by Bryan Mellonie and Robert Ingpen
(Sydney, Bantam, 1983)
Preschool to school age.
This book talks about the various lengths of life spans for plants, animals, and people and says that dying is very much a part of living. It explains that there is a beginning and an end with living in between, and that sometimes things are too hurt or ill to continue living, so they die.

The Tenth Good Thing about Barney, by Judith Viorst
(New York, Athenaeum, 1971)
Preschool to school age.
This book tells the story of a cat who dies and is buried. The child and father discuss heaven, and later they plant seeds in the garden. The father explains that Barney will become part of the ground and help plants grow, which they decide is a pretty good job for a cat.

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School Age

Today My Sister Died, by Ronee Domske
School age.
This is a story narrated by an older sister who lost a 3 and 1/2-year-old sister in an accident. She shows how to deal with things by discussing her relationships with her brother and parents, and by exploring the feelings that come about during funeral planning, holidays, doing things with friends, getting a family picture taken, and remembering.

The Magic Moth, by V. Lee
(Houghton Mifflin, 1972, available in paperback from Clarion, 1981)
School age.
This book tells the story of a 10-year-old girl with a heart defect and the impact her death has on her family. It is told from the perspective of her six-year-old brother, describing with compassion and realism his thoughts, feelings, anger, questions, uncertainties, and confusion.

Children are Not Paper Dolls, by E. Levy
(Linn Press, 1982)
School age.
This book tells about the wide variety of reactions and feeling from children who have lost a sibling. Pictures, poems, and quotes from bereaved siblings look at funerals, families, friends, school, holidays, and feelings.

My Twin Sister Erika, by I. Voge
(Harper and Row, 1976)
School age.
This story expresses the feelings of love and rivalry between twin sisters and the strong feelings of loss when one dies.

Aarvy Aardvark Finds Hope, by Donna O'Toole
School age.
In this book, Aarvy the Aardvark is befriended by Ralphy Rabbit, who helps Aarvy work through stages of grief by telling him about how he felt when his sister died.

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Late School Age to Adolescent

Beat the Turtle Drum, by by C. Green
(Viking, 1976, also available in paperback from Dell, 1979)
Late school age to adolescent.
This book tells the story of two sisters who are great friends and the anger, guilt, and sadness one of them feels when the other is suddenly killed by an accidental fall from a tree.

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Adolescent

Straight Talk about Death for Teenagers: How to Cope with Losing Someone You Love, by E. Grollman
(Boston, Beacon Press, 1993)
Adolescent.
This book speaks to teens in a way that acknowledges their feelings, promotes discussion and offers hope.

Losing Someone You Love: When a Brother or Sister Dies, by E. Richter
(New York, Putnam, 1986)
Adolescent.
In this book, 15 young people who have lost a brother or sister share their grief experiences. With honesty and courage, they talk openly about how the death occurred, their feelings, and their difficulties adjusting at home and at school.